Are you a Screamer?

Are you a screamer? How effective is that, really? We all lose our cool sometimes- although I like to think I have the patience of a saint- reality is, when I am already 15 minutes late for wrok and have a forty five minute commute to get there, still have my son trying to find his shoes, and the front door was left open so the dog has run off.... Sometimes I do yell (or as I call it, talking very firmly in a loud voice...) So, when I ran across the following article I thought, "Whew... I am not alone..." So, check it out- then tell me... How do you keep it together?

Why Parents Scream - Amy Wilson Explains Why Today's Moms Yell So Much

Author Amy Wilson wants grandparents to know why parents scream so much at their children today. The reasons might surprise you.

View >>

A little about me... Mommy Tyme

I just finished reviewing a few private comments I had received from this blog, and I thought, WOW! How did I miss that? I have not really introduced myself or told you anything about why I am writing this blog...

Obviously from the shop widgets and my links you can see that I am a handmade nut! I love to create, and do so fanatically! I currently have a web site at http://www.mommytyme.org and I have several shops:
http://www.MommyTyme.etsy.com
http://www.zibbet.com/MommyTyme
http://fuzzb.com/MommyTyme

Along with 2 blogs that discuss creating and selling handmade:

http://mommysreviewsyoucanuse.blogspot.com
http://mishapsofmommy.blogspot.com

Along with this, I run a group home for adults with developmental disabilities and have done this for many, many, many years... In fact, since I was 18 (39, now!) that is the profession I have always found myself in... (a few waitress jobs here and there, but my passion is working with individuals with special needs). Why? Because of respect. I respect my clients and do not see the differences that others might. We are all unique and diverse- and my clients diversity is simply in development rather than race, gender, etc. I love the fact that when I come to work I have a family- when I go home from work, I have a family. And whenever possible, I attempt to mix it all together!

Along with that, I am also a full time grad student in Child and Adolescent Development. I am nearing the end. I have a four year old son whom we adopted 3 years ago - and he is literally my sun and moon!

But, when I became a mom at 36 years- for the first time- I thought everything I did was wrong.. I am so used to developmental deficits and delays that I did not know what "normal" development was... and I know there must be a zillion people out there just like me! When I have a question, I research it! Thus, the beginning of this blog...

Also, I think that prevention and intervention is the path to healthy, happy lives. Cultural diversity is key, and the family dynamics need to be unique and individual- but, there are some universal truths that we all must take into consideration! Teratogens will harm your baby. Neglect can be emotional or physical. Etc. and Etc. This is stuff you cant just find out on your own...or it will be too late. We all need to share it with our neighbors, friends, and family. Furthermore, children are having children and they may not have the knowledge, training or skills that they need to be a parent. This is where we, as a community, have to offer assistance - or the future generations are going to be psychologically inept.

Thus, my blog-

I really encourage you to ask questions, comment, share personal experiences! I want to hear from everyone. I do not know everything (my four year old tells me that on a regular basis)- but I WANT to know everything. What works for one family, may not work for another- but a solution exists- we just have to find it!

So, please share and help others! This blog does not have a lot of followers- but it does have a lot of readers- and what you say matters and helps someone else- isn't that a fantastic contribution?

So, feel free to introduce yourself, post your blog links (even if they are unrelated! That is ok, it give us insight to you...) ans share your stories! I tend to lean towards the clinical view of things- so some heartwarming tales of love are always appreciated!

Temperament .... Can you change it?

Many parents are concerned that when they first begin to understand their babies temperament that this is a reaction to them, or maybe there is something wrong with their child... Their baby is more fussy than other babies, their baby is less responsive or seems unattentive to things- But, Temperament is actually biologically linked- an innate characteristic of your baby! Some aspects can be modified, but it is more likely the parent is going to have to modify to the temperament- Here is a short discussion of the topic I recently wrote-

Temperament- Nature vs. Nurture How does the Caregiver fit in?

Temperament is the innate trait that mediates a child’s interactions and approach to their environment, and the social aspects within their world (Child Development Institute). Personality is formed from the interactions within the environment and the biological traits characteristic of that child (Child Development Institute). Temperament can be distinguished very early in development. These observations are of biologically linked behaviors that are individual and unique to that child (Sturm, 2004). Characteristics that are observable include fear, irritability, frustration, level of activity, positive approach and attentional persistence (Sturm, 2004).

Temperament is referred to as the building block of personality and can best be explained by use of a theoretical model (Sturm, 2004). The current model used dissects temperament into (Sturm, 2004). These dimensions are explained as emotional or Attentional Reactivity and Self Regulation (Sturm, 2004). Emotional and Attentional Reactivity is explained as the intensity and reaction to the external stimuli, while Self Regulation is the ability to accept and manage the personal reaction to the stimuli (Sturm, 2004). Attentional control, another dimension used to explain temperament, develops later in childhood (Sturm, 2004).

Temperament is based in the genetic makeup of the infant. Research has identified similar temperament of identical twins contrary to the findings in research of fraternal twins (Berk, 2008). Similarities in temperament characteristics can be determined across ethnic and gender populations (Berk, 2008). There is some consideration given to cultural and caregiver values in regards to their reactions to the child (Berk, 2008). For example, some caregiver reactions are gender biased in that the reactions differ based on the gender of the child (Berk, 2008). Similarly, cultural values towards parenting and reactions differ greatly. Asian parents react to their infants much differently than Native Americans (Berk, 2008). The cultural experience influences how affectionate, proximity, paternal involvement, etc. caregivers express in their child rearing practices (Berk, 2008). The cultural values also promote or impair the Goodness of fit in regards to care giving (Berk, 2008). Goodness of fit refers to eh ability of the caregiver to adapt their reactions to the temperament of the child (Berk, 2008).

Although temperament is observable with infants, it is most often measured in research through use of questionnaires, thus the risk of biased reporting is always a factor (Berk, 2008). Temperament shows some stability over time, however, situations also influence the stability of individual temperament characteristics (Sturm, 2004). Temperament appears to be modified by parenting skills, reactions to distress and other signals exerted by the infant, and the immediate familial environment of the child (Berk, 2008). Nutritional and emotional neglect can alter temperament, creating fearful, inattentive characteristics (Berk, 2008). These characteristics remain present even after an intervention has been implemented (Berk, 2008).

Temperament also develops with age; therefore any predictions relative to temperament should be postponed until the child is at least three years of age (Berk, 2008). This is largely due to the development of emotional, attentional and activity systems (Berk, 2008). For example, impulse control is thought to develop along with the frontal lobe development between ages two and three (Berk, 2008).

Temperament is a biologically based reactivity state of the child to stimuli within the environment. The characteristics of the temperament determine the eventual personality of the child and influence future outcomes. The temperament can be altered by both positive and negative caregiver reactions to the infant. The reactions of the caregiver can be linked to the cultural values the family is experiencing, or unique behaviors of the caregiver. A key component to understanding and addressing the child’s temperament is the acceptance of the temperament and ability to adapt the environment to best meet the child’s unique characteristics. Temperament may change with age, experiences, and biological development, but some characteristics may remain consistent throughout development for the child. Acceptance of the temperament characteristics and the view that these characteristics created the uniqueness for that child is imperative for the caregiver to acknowledge.


Valerie Poling

References:

Berk, L. E. (2008). Temperament. In L. E. Berk, Infants, Children, and Adolescents (pp. 129-249). Boston: Pearson Publishing.

Child Development Institute. (n.d.). Temperament and Your Child's Personality. Retrieved January 30, 2010, from Child Development Institute: http://www.childdevelopmentinfo.com/development/temperament_a...

Sturm, L. (2004, March). Temperament in Early childhood: A primer for the Perplexed. Retrieved January 28, 2010, from Zero to Three: http://zerotothree.org/site/DocServer/Temperament

Well, besides my pursuit of the perfect Handmade Holiday, there is also the meal planning and festivities to think about (it's not all gifts, you know...)! One problem, or consideration, when YOU are the host, is what to serve? These days it is hard to just do a traditional turkey or ham because there are so many diet variations that people adhere to. In my family, I have one set of vegetarians, and another set who only eat organic (including meat)! Now, I don't have cows or pigs to slaughter, so that is a little difficult for me to do. I have, however, located some pretty fun recipes on the web. I am going to share these with you over the next few weeks- if you try ANY of them, please share with us! As a mom who works full time out of the house, and trying to run my own in house business, plus taking classes- I really don't get to cook to much! In fact, weekends I cook everything up for the entire week- freeze some of it- and we live off of that Monday thru Friday!
So, if you do use the recipes I list here, they are GREAT!, let us know! If they land everyone in the ER with stomach pain, let us know!

So, here we go...

For the vegetarians I found this great little site that has tons of vegetarian recipes. You can actually plug in ingredients you want to use, and it will pull up recipes that use those for you! Very cool....

http://www.mydailymoment.com/recipes/category/vegetarian.php

now, remember to think of yourself during the holidays! Don't let the entire event become overwhelming and you run yourself into the ground, either! There are lots of things you can do to beat the stress! I found a great site with a few tips that can really help! check this out!

http://www.qualityhealth.com/featured-article-segment?fa=179&rf=41138&mc=MjA2MjgwNDA.&ct=36928

Hey, if you have ideas or thoughts on beating stress, share them here with us, too! We could all use a little down time for ourselves! Remember, you can always stop by Mommy Tyme and grab yourself a handmade soap or foaming bubble bath, and retreat to your tub for an hour with a good book! Check out the new serenity bar with essential oils known to calm and relax! On sale now at http://www.MommyTyme.etsy.com

Get your Children to Eat Healthier... More Veggies, Please!

9 Simple Ways to Get Your Kids to Eat More Veggies

More Help Can Be Found At Dine Without Whine

It seems like a never-ending battle with the kids. Although you and I know veggies are delicious and they’re also good for you, they act like vegetables are a plague they want to avoid at all costs.

If you need creative ways to get your kids to eat more vegetables, here are 9 ideas to incorporate into your daily meals right away:

1. Make healthy choices readily available and put the sugary and greasy snacks away. This doesn’t mean totally deprive yourselves of these delightful treats, but making healthy eating a normal part of your day goes a long way to helping kids develop better eating habits.

2. Add veggies like carrots or even asparagus to smoothies. Kids love fruit smoothies and they’ll never know you put in a little of those dreaded vegetables in.

3. Sneak vegetables into other foods. For example: Add grated carrots into spaghetti sauce or make a zucchini chocolate cake.

4. Try dip. You know kids love to dip everything. Just make sure they know they have to eat the dip stick and not just lick it!

5. Take your kids shopping with you. Let your child pick out a new vegetable in the grocery store that they’ve never tried. Then prepare the vegetable together.

6. Be patient and consistent. Avoid having a tantrum yourself when your child has a tantrum about vegetables on their plate. Sometimes it will take several times of serving the same food before your child is even willing to try it.

7. Make it artistic and fun. Place veggies into a smiley face on your child’s plate or decorate a pizza with them.

8. Let them choose: raw or cooked. Some children may have a definite preference as to whether their veggies are cooked or raw.

9. Plan your meals. Sometimes it’s easy to forget the veggies when you don’t have a plan…allowing your kids to get into the habit of veggie-free meals. Plan your meals and grocery lists in advance, so you won’t come up short on the greenery.

To make your meal planning a whole lot easier, sign up for you 1 ¢ no-risk trial at Dine Without Whine. They put together your weekly dinner plan and even make a quick and easy printable grocery list for you. Click here to get started

I know it's not Valentines Day, but sometimes we get so busy we forget about "us"

;

Prepare a Romantic Dinner At Home For Valentine's Day

By: Christine Steendahl

Remember those pre-child days when you would go out to a fancy restaurant or spend the weekend at a romantic get-away to celebrate Valentine’s Day? That may not be an option this year, but you can still enjoy a romantic dinner with your spouse. Here are a few ideas on how you can easily create a romantic Valentine’s Day dinner at home.

Creating The Menu
This is the perfect time for some “Grown-up” food. Cook a separate dinner for the kids or order in some pizza. Let the kids eat an early dinner and then send them off to play, or watch a movie while the two of you enjoy your meal. If your children are really young, you may want to put them to bed before you sit down for your Valentine’s Day dinner.

Cooking a restaurant inspired meal doesn’t have to be complicated. Pick up some mini-quiches in your grocers frozen food section and bake them up as an appetizer. For a first course pick up a can of gourmet style soup that you just need to heat up. Garnish with a dollop of sour cream and some fresh herbs for visual appeal.

Choose a main dish that you can prepare ahead of time, so you can enjoy the evening. Good choices are baked salmon or chicken. Just place either one in a baking dish, add whichever marinade you prefer and refrigerate. When you are ready just bake it until it’s done. Serve with mixed greens and fancy store-bought vinaigrette. Grab French bread, or fix some wild rice.

Dessert could be anything from cheesecake with fresh fruit, to chocolate dipped strawberries to chocolate mouse that you can make ahead and refrigerate. Or serve assorted cheeses with a nice glass of red wine.

Setting The Scene
Set the table with a tablecloth, cloth napkins and candles. Take out your good china and crystal. Since dinner will be just for the two of you, you don’t have to worry about damaging any of your special tableware. Now is the perfect time to enjoy all these fancy goodies you received as wedding gifts.

Take the time to dress up, and do your hair and makeup. I feel sure you spouse will appreciate it and you will feel like you are actually going out. For even more fun get ready in separate rooms and ask your date to come pick you up.

Turn down the lights and light the candles. Play some soft, romantic music, or some songs that have special meaning for the two of you. You never know, with the right music, your romantic Valentine’s Day dinner may end with some slow dancing in your dinning room.

Staying in doesn’t mean you can’t have a wonderful romantic Valentine’s Day dinner. You never know, this may turn out to be the most romantic Valentine’s date yet.

Author Resource -> Christine Steendahl Is The Founder Of Dine Without Whine – Your Number One Online Source For Affordable And Family Friendly Weekly Meal Planning. Eliminate The Dinner Hour Stress And Re-Discover The Pleasure Of The Dinner Hour! For A Free Sample Menu And Grocery List Visit http://www.dinewithoutwhine.com/offer

Article From FreeAffiliateArticles.com

Fun for you, Fun for the family, A Handmade Christmas...

With Halloween just around the corner, how about spending some quality time with your kids and really making it fun!?

Try this- definitely worth the money (which isn't much) but, wow! so much to do!

The holidays stressing you out? Want to give something handmade, unique? Well, shop Mommy Tyme Bath and gifts for that next great idea!

Visit MommyTyme's ArtFire Shop

Or make something fun yourself! Check out the link below! These aren't just brownies! These are all kinds of fun, unique and creative ideas packed into a jar! You will be amazed!

How to Create a Family Budget

For singles, creating a budget is relatively easy. They tend to have a good handle on how much money they have coming in, and when tracking expenses, they only have their own to think about. But creating a family budget is a whole new ball game.

Most families have multiple sources of income. And when there are multiple spenders, that makes things much more confusing. This is one of the main reasons that families lack a formal budget. But having a budget and sticking to it can greatly improve a family's financial outlook.

Making a family budget may be tricky, but it can be done. Here's how.

1. Take inventory of all income. If a certain source of income fluctuates from month to month, use the lowest amount or average it out.
2. Keep track of all expenses for a month or so. Keep all of your receipts, and ask all family members to turn theirs in to you each day.
3. Add up your monthly expenses. Be sure to include bills, debt payments, groceries, and everyday expenses such as lunch money and transportation costs.
4. Get the family together and discuss ways you can trim the budget. Getting input from other family members will help you determine which expenses are necessary and which ones could be cut down or eliminated. Maybe you or your spouse could start taking lunch to work instead of eating out, or maybe the kids can drop an extracurricular activity.
5. In addition to individual expenses, discuss how you can cut down on the electric bill, groceries and other necessary family expenses. Consider such things as carpooling or taking public transportation, buying more generic foods and adjusting the thermostat.
6. Estimate how much you can save on regular expenses, and cut the completely unnecessary items out of the budget. Then refigure it and see where you stand.
7. If you end up with a surplus, allocate a portion of it to savings. If you're in the red, go back and rework the budget until you have more income than expenses.

Being Realistic

One reason that family budgets often fail is because they're just not realistic. It's great to cut down on expenses, but sometimes we tend to go too far. For example, cutting entertainment out of the budget completely might look good on paper, but we all need a little diversion every now and then.

Instead of cutting such things out of the budget completely, consider finding ways to lower the cost. Going back to the entertainment example, maybe you've been going to dinner and a movie as a family twice a month. But eating in and renting a new release would be much cheaper, and you would still get to spend quality time together.

Individual expenses can also be tricky. This can be resolved by allocating a certain amount for each family member to spend each week. If someone spends his entire amount before the week is up, reevaluate his expenses and adjust if necessary.

Creating a family budget can help keep spending under control, leaving more money to pay down debts and save for future goals. But in order to succeed, close monitoring is essential. Your efforts will be rewarded, however, with less financial stress and more money in the long run.


All Finance Content

Get Organized and De Clutter

Home Organization 101: Easy Steps to a Clutter Free Home

When you first move into your home it seems like you have so much space. As the years pass, you might find yourself becoming a pack rat. What are you going to do with all the stuff you have accumulated? Perhaps it’s time to weed out the unnecessary items and organize your home.

Home organization is a step-by-step process. It will take more than a day or even a week to get everything to a manageable level, but once you do staying organized is an easier task. If you have a family, enlist their help. They can pitch in and learn a thing or two about controlling clutter in their life.

1. Start with the high traffic areas. The living room and kitchen are usually the two most used rooms in the house. Everything gets dropped on a counter or the couch in these two places. Concentrate on getting everything set up the way that you like it before moving on to another room.

2. Use storage containers. Over the years, the style of storage containers has upgraded to be pretty as well as functional. Instead of storing containers in stacks in the garage, purchase ones that match your décor in each room and integrate them so that no one would even notice they were being used for storage.

3. Divide items into categories. You can use heavy duty trash bags for this part. Everything that you find can go into a pile: KEEP, THROW AWAY, GIVE AWAY, and RELOCATE. Items that will stay in that room are to keep. Things that you don’t need or are broken can be thrown away. Clothes or furniture still in great condition can be donated and scheduled for pickup by the Veteran’s association or Goodwill. Anything that definitely belongs in another room can be labeled for relocation when you get to that room.

4. Remove everything from drawers and cabinets. This is a time-consuming process but it is easier to start with an empty space and fill it instead of simply pushing things around. If you line things up on the counter, someone else can help by putting the items in some type of order.

5. Make use of all of your available space. In the kitchen, for example, appliances or extra containers can be stored on top of the cabinets provided they don’t extend all the way to the ceiling. That’s extra storage space without benefit of a storage container. Also use the top of the refrigerator for cereal boxes and breakfast food like boxes of instant oatmeal or grits. In the bedroom, shoes and winter clothes can go into flat storage bins that slide easily under the bed or the dresser.

6. Label your containers. Use tape and a permanent marker to identify the contents of your storage containers. Avoid writing on the actual container in case they are reused and the contents are changed. Labeling also makes for easy identification if you decide to sell or give away a container of books or something. You won’t have to open each container to locate them.

Organizing your entire house takes time. But, once it is done, returning everything you use to its proper place will maintain that same level of organization.

Find more like this:
All Mom Content

Some Helper's, Some Extra's

Here are some great savings, coupons, and more that I would love to share with you...





Escape in a Great Book...




Enter and Win....







Great Gift Ideas... Holidays are coming soon:






These are just a few things I wanted to share with you! If you need help, have questions, etc. Please comment and I will do my best to give you the support you need!

Good 4 U Recipes! More to love! Freebies!

Easy Tuna casserole- Yum!

http://www.nubella.com/component/option,com_recipes/Itemid,94/task,detail/rid,1400/s,3/r,easy/

Free Diet Sample Pack- Yes, I said free!

http://www.getyourfreedietsamplepack.com/?DTPartner=1&CampaignID=91&bid=960&aid=CD52&opt=CD99&SubID=&afid=CD12864

Free Jiffy Mix Recipe Book

http://www.jiffymix.com/

Loreal and Redken Shampoo Samples! Again, Free!

http://www.gifthouse.us.com/?config=6284&src=WC-182232aaa:220085:


These are just a few things I thought you might enjoy this week! Remember, check out my blog, Reviews you can Use, for ongoing freebies, coupons, and reviews of products you use everyday! See whats new, what stinks, and what you can use! http://mommysreviewsyoucanuse.blogspot.com